Sunday, November 9, 2014

On "Sluttiness"

I don't like the word "slut" because it demeans promiscuous individuals, and promiscuity isn't really a bad thing as long as it's practiced in a completely ethical way. Throughout history there has always been the double-standard of promiscuous men getting the more positive label of “player” for having a lot of sex while promiscuous women get the label of “slut” for the same thing. I suppose that in a way, with the invention of the word “man-slut”, we are moving toward a more equal direction, but rather than unnecessarily judging more people I would like to see society move in the opposite direction and judge less people.
Does another person’s sexual history really have a negative impact on your life in any way whatsoever? If you’re planning to date the person it’s a good idea to make sure that you trust them enough to not cheat on you before committing to them, but otherwise the level of sexual activity in a person’s history shouldn’t be relevant to the way that we treat the person. If someone lives their life being kind to others and always makes a point of not hurting anyone, but they also happen to be promiscuous, they should still be seen as a good person and not as a “slut”. Does having a lot of sex really make someone any less of a person than they would be otherwise? I would consider a person’s morality to be based on the way that they treat others, not on their level of sexual activity.

Of course it is possible for promiscuity to be practiced in a bad way. For instance, if someone were to emotionally hurt a significant other by committing to a relationship but continue to have sex with other people anyway. But a high frequency of sexual activity on its own should not be treated as negatively as it is. It is natural to desire to explore sexuality in the young adult years, and labeling others as “sluts” for exploring that desire is unnecessary. Let people figure themselves out as it works best for them, and save the labels for behaviors that are actually disruptive to others.

3 comments:

  1. I would even say that using the term promiscuous is wrong. There are a lot of negative connotations that come along with that term. Also, we never describe men as being "promiscuous." I understand your point and agree, but the term "promiscuous" is itself a label. Just something to acknowledge and be cautious of.

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    1. As someone who went to high school and college before AIDS came along, I don't understand why either sex (or should I say "either gender"?) is looked at negatively for having multiple partners.

      What non-negative term would you use to describe a man instead of promiscuous? Masculine? Alpha? Normal?!?

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  2. Ah, I didn't know that promiscuous had negative connotation attached to it. Yes, the point of the article was to discourage judging one another so much on our love/sex lives, so I'll have to find another word to describe it without the negative connotations.

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